Power to the Positoids
November 11, 2008
I recently wrote about how cool it would be for Sean Strub, founder of Poz Magazine, to be appointed as the AIDS Czar by the Obama Administration.
The New York Times has already endorsed Sean. Not for AIDS Czar, but for having a cool home and being one of the best ambassador’s us positoids have. In the article, Sean says, “One only needs to look at the invisibility of AIDS in this year’s presidential contest to see how our political muscle has atrophied.”
And that’s why we need him. Badly.
The good news about Obama and the AIDS epidemic is that he has already endorsed condom use as a means to prevent HIV transmission. And when he recently spoke about getting his girls a First Dog, Obama mentioned the possibility of rescuing one from the shelter. Just like Sean Strub did. Hmmmm….
If President Elect Obama doesn’t see it my way, I live two-hours from D.C. and have a closet full of foam board and markers. I will drive there and picket if I have to. We need people living with AIDS in positions of political and social influence, and having a knowledgeable, compassionate positoid as the AIDS Czar would be incredibly inspiring.
Yes we can.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
The New President, and a New AIDS Czar
November 5, 2008
Obama won handily and currently holds 348 electoral votes to McCain’s 173 finish: Barack Obama will be the next president of the United States.
In his last Mavericky move, McCain quietly submits his write-in vote for “Daffy Duck”.
My homestate of Virginia went a bit Daffy Duck, going blue for Obama. I wasn’t entirely surprised only because I had the opportunity to drive around rural Virginia with Gwenn, reminding “sporadic Democrats” to vote. There were more Obama/Biden signs out in yards in the sticks than I was expecting to see, which was refreshing, especially since I live in the liberal-minded Charlottesville.
McCain’s concession speech was very gracious and, coming down the stretch, he was able to show signs of why he was so well-liked back in the 2000 race, in oddball ways like his hilarious visit to Saturday Night Live. (I think he was “reverse Gored”, in the same way Al Gore was handcuffed by his Democractic advisors in 2000.) During Obama’s acceptance speech, he made it clear he’s going to do his best to accomodate the more than 50 million voters who supported McCain. I remember Bush saying the same thing in 2000 and, being anti-Bush, I felt like I needed to not be a dick and take the man at his word.
Then, a couple of days after he was sworn in, I was walking through the Charlotte airport with Gwenn, on the way to one of our talks, and we passed a newstand. USA Today had a headline, “Bush to Close White House Office on AIDS”, the story lhad been eaked to the press.
The AIDS community went nuts. Bush retracted the statement, then silently killed the office by placing incompetents and condom-doubters in high positions of influence and power. I was free to be as much of a dick as I wanted in terms of how I viewed the new president.
Now, we have the highest voter turnout since 1908. People will be watching and, hopefully, letting their voices be heard as we all do our parts to support this country that we love- AIDS, warts, and all.
I have a lot of hope as to how Barack Obama will handle the domestic AIDS crisis. If nothing changes, his young daughters, in twenty years time, will be in a demographic where HIV is the leading cause of death. It’s time to get real about the epidemic, and utilize people who get it.
Which leads me back to the White House Office on AIDS and, ultimately, the AIDS Czar. I know who would make a perfect one: Sean Strub, founder of Poz Magazine.
He’s from Iowa, a rural guy who moved to the big city of New York and started an AIDS magazine in the 90’s, which gave information to rural positoids in doctor’s office all across the country, empowering people to get knowledgeable about their own health. Sean knows the AIDS community inside and out, is politically active and aware and has a unique combination that Obama shares: an inspiring mix of intelligence and heart.
Oh, and he’s a gay man. And after the passage of the anti-gay Proposition 8 in California, as well as in other states, the gay community needs to be elevated into as many positions of influence and power. I was very happy to hear Obama include the gay community in his acceptance speech.
Sean Strub’s rise to the position of AIDS Czar will come to be known as Proposition AIDS. By putting someone with over twenty years of experience living with HIV in there, we’d have a real voice looking out for the concerns of those living with HIV, while doing everything possible to prevent the spread of the virus.
Please join me as I wholeheartedly support Sean Strub for AIDS Czar.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Vote Tomorrow, Or Not
November 3, 2008
Tomorrow is the election- vote. It’s kind of a big deal.
If you are undecided, never mind what I just wrote. If you don’t know by now you won’t figure it out, and it’s not something you can re-do the next day if you feel like you got it wrong. My advice is to sit this one out, and hope there are two candidates that are a bit more distinguishable from one another the next time around.
Plus, it’s not fair to someone who has been jazzed about McCain or Obama for months now.
If you have HIV, you should know that Obama is already focusing on thedomestic AIDS issue, and supports the funding of the Ryan White CARE Act.
I live in a state that could go either way- Virginia, which means there’s been some nasty business here. Reverend Wright commercials are playing around the clock, and some have even distributed flyers informing prospective Democrats to vote on Wednesday to avoid the rush… (Republicans, of course, are advised to vote on Tuesday.) There have also been reports of robo-calling in Florida, incredibly up for grabs as well, telling people they can vote by phone.
A lot of polls seem to be indicating that it will be Obama who prevails on Tuesday. But me? I’m still not convinced. Truth be told, I’m scared. So scared, in fact, I am refusing to take off my make-up from my Halloween costume, Frankenstein’s monster, until this whole thing is over.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
“ArrrrrARGhhhGH!”
(Translation: “I am Joe the Plumber.”)
Most Important Election?
October 29, 2008
Disclaimer: Another entry about politics…
It’s one week until our next president is elected. All the polls indicate that Obama is in the lead, and that Virginia is going to be a key state. They say if Virginia is called early, Obama likely has won. If it trails off into the night, I say that Joe the Positoid will be Joe Six Pack times two.
Or no, wait, if I vote for Obama I’m not a “real Virginian”. And I probably would be considered Joe Chardonnay, not Joe Six-Pack. Either way, if Obama tanks, I’m getting tanked. If I have to resort to huffing to get through the night, then so be it.
This is widely considered to be the most important election of my young generation. Yes, the first black president of the United States is pretty badass, but after the last eight years I’d have to say that 2000 has thus far been the election of my lifetime.
A sex scandal! A Democratic one! Which caused a Vice President to avoid using a widely popular sitting president to win an election! And out of nowhere, a former president’s son comes to the rescue and runs a successful campaign as, get this, a Washington outsider!
I, of course, was in the tank for Al Gore. I look back on that wide-eyed, young 25-year old positoid I once was, thinking that the Republican party blew their chances when they went with Bush over McCain. I was convinced that McCain would beat Gore in the general, and that Bush didn’t have a shot. They guy just seemed like a bit of a manchild.
I felt bad for McCain when he lost the primary in 2000. I kind of liked the guy, especially when he railed against Jerry Falwell for being an “agent of intolerence.” Plus he was really cool with the Daily Show guys, calling them a bunch of “rapscallions” or something of the sort.
Then I felt horrible with Gore’s agonizing, drawn-out defeat. Say what you will about Florida, but if Gore hadn’t have kissed his wife at the convention, and had won his home state of Tennessee, Florida wouldn’t have mattered. Several years later, the American voting public lined up to kick me in the balls once again when young Sanjaya was voted off of Idol.
But I digress.
McCain may be running on fumes and squeezing the assumed soul of Joe the Plumber for every ounce of inspiration, I still think that he is unbeatable in the general election. And if he does win, I will blame the Democrats for not supporting my original choice for the party’s nomination: Mr. Dennis Kucinich.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
I Am Not Joe the Plumber
October 29, 2008
Joe the Plumber has officially endorsed John McCain!
I really can’t stand that guy, Joe. A political operative, and now a rallying call for the McCain camp, who namedrop him as some kind of proof that they have a blue-collared friend. “How ’bout that Joe? He sure did tell Obama, didn’t he?”
No, Joe stood there like a douche with his arms crossed, pretending to listen to Obama answer his manufactured question. Joe delivered his lines as stiffly as the poor actors in this ad who are pretending to admire Joe.
t’s suspicious how often McCain is mentioning Joe the Plumber. It’s making me think that, should McCain pull off the upset, he’d support gay marriage just so he can pursue Joe and lock down down the deal before anyone else can.
Positively Yours,
Joe the Positoid
Vice Presidential Debate Results
October 3, 2008
Going into last night’s debate, I wanted to get an honest, untainted opinion on who did better. Because I can’t trust MSNBC or Fox News, or even myself.
Then it came to me at lunch. As I sat there with Gwenn, my brother Kip and his family which includes a beautiful wife and two daughters (9 and six months old, respectively) it came to me: the children are the future. That cheesy song is right… they will have to live with the consequences of this election longer than I will, and they don’t even get to vote!
That’s why I turned to a new neighbor to sort this debate out. Meet My Pet Virus’ first political correspondent: Evelyn.
If you read this blog, you actually met her a couple of weeks ago in True Babies.
Evelyn is three weeks old, and I decided to watch the debate with her and monitor her responses, like those weird lifelines that float up and down the screen, representing undecided Women and Men voters, and occasionally Republicans, Democrats and Independents.
Well, all those test groups have had a lifetime of manipulating. As I watched Evelyn drool, I knew I’d found the perfect barometer to gauge the candidates. Of course, she’s too young to speak, so I made a few categories: Grunt, Cry and Smile.
With pen in hand, I awkwardly watched Evelyn as the Vice Presidential candidates met center stage… it was awkward because Evelyn was breast feeding. “Research!” I told my friend, Lauren, as she tended to her child.
Democrat Joe Biden got off to a shakey start, eliciting a scathing nipple Bite, forcing me to adjust and create a new category on the fly. That was followed by a ten-minute nap: not a good sign for the Senator from Delaware.
Evelyn woke up just in time to get her first taste of Sarah Palin, and I wondered if sexism against Joe might make Palin a more comfortable fit for the young politico?
As Palin addressed the nation, Evelyn grunted and smiled. My notion rang true, and I did not judge her, just wrote down the results like a real reporter…
Then it happened- as Sarah Palin was in mid-riff, Evelyn began to cry. Change she could believe in involved a clean diaper, and crapping her pants had evened out Joe’s sleep-inducing policy wonking.
Forty minutes in, this was anybody’s debate.
A Grunt for Joe, then a Bite for Palin, “Ouch!” Lauren screamed. Just as it seemed like this thing was Biden’s, he inspired another Grunt and his second Bite of the evening. He was trailing, and Evelyn was spent, retiring to her crib with a little less than half the debate to go: like most Americans, she’d seen enough… I set down my pen, and then, as Palin spoke Evelyn cried from afar, helping Biden narrowly escape with a draw.
I’m hoping I can tap Evelyn for the next Presidential Debate, where I’ll make sure to take note of not only her responses, but the topics that set her off. Still, overall I’m happy about this, and thus far most media sources agree with the three-week old, though I doubt Wolf Blitzer or Sean Hannity shat themselves.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Do It For Bullwinkle, Joe
October 2, 2008
On Monday, I posted my thoughts on the bailout, and that it should include covering the minor gambling losses of people with AIDS. Namely me.
Well, later that day Obama sent me a signal through the national media, just a little hint that I’d be taken care. And I quote: “I enjoy a little friendly game of poker myself every now and then,” Obama said… what else could that possibly mean?
The media is once again allowing themselves to get excited about a political debate, with tonight’s Biden V. Palin slobberknocker. The hype machine reminds me of boxing, where I’m constantly told that I can’t miss something, only to tune and be let down.
Fight of the Millenium, anyone? That was Oscar de la Hoya VS. Felix “Tito” Trinidad. In 1999, the two best fighters in the world circled one another for 12 rounds, hardly throwing a punch and uncapitivating an audience whose bloodlust would have to be satiated elsewhere.
If entertainment is what you seek, my friend made a Palin parody of the uber-catchy summer hit, “I Kissed a Girl”. It’s called “I Killed a Moose”, check it out here.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Potential Debate Subs for McCain
September 26, 2008
John McCain may not debate Barack Obama tonight. If he doesn’t, here are my Top 3 Dream Replacement Opponents for Obama.
#1 The Ultimate Warrior
#2 The Great Khali (with Jim Carrey moderating)
#3…
OK, any wrestler or wrestling manager will do.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Coming Out, Bailing Out
September 25, 2008
I started my week-on cycle of HIV meds on Tuesday night, which can be confusing enough as it is. I don’t need any help in being confused.
But that’s what happened when I got up for a bowl of cereal, only to discover that “Clay Aiken is Gay” was a national news story yesterday thanks to Friday’s People Magazine cover story.
I’m not going to pile on Aiken here. Nor am I going to mention his first solo album was called “Measure of a Man”. I can’t imagine how hard or terrifying it must be to have a country analyzing your sexual identity before you’ve figured it out for yourself.
OK, maybe I piled on a little. But while we are stating the obvious, here’s my pitch to People for next week’s cover…
As I polished off the last of the Raisin Bran, I also saw that Bono was going to be meeting with Sarah Palin, which all but sealed my decision to be Early 90’s Bono for Halloween.
I know, Bono does great things for the world. That’s why I’m thinking one night of Bono isn’t going to be enough. In these tough economic times, I’m thinking about doing Full Bono through the end of the year. If I can one club to book me as The Fly, I’ll have enough money to consider bringing a baby of my own into this world. (Spermwashing is expensive!)
Plus, if I can make enough money I won’t have to pull any dangerous publicity stunts to boost book sales, such as picking a fight with Erin Weed. Something I’m hoping that I can bail out on.
Speaking of bailouts, that seems to be a running theme lately, with the economic crisis of which I know so little that I am limiting my writing of such to the term “economic crisis”. Last night, McCain bailed on David Letterman to get to D.C. to handle the crisis- hilarity ensued when Letterman picked up a live feed of McCain sitting down with Katie Couric in the same building during Dave’s taping.
Check it out here.
I say everyone go ball’s out on bail outs this weekend. Well, everyone should go balls out except Jack Nicholson. We can all agree that we’ve seen enough there.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Jane Swiftboats Palin
September 10, 2008
While on the campaign trail in Virginia, Sen. Obama delivered one of his canned lines about the Republican ticket. “You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.”
McCain’s newly appointed damage/mind control operative, former Mass. Governor Jane Swift, swiftboated the vice presidential candidate, referred to the phrase, saying the words were “…disgusting comments, comparing our vice presidential nominee, Sarah Palin, to a pig.”
Gee, Jane, tell us what you really think of Sarah Palin?
What is disgusting is the McCain campaign’s new political attack ad. They are saying Obama voted for comprehensive sex education for kindergarteners. Does the McCain campaign really want to go there? Mr. “I’m Not Sure if Condoms Prevent the Spread of HIV”?
And will Jane Swiftboat be held accountable for calling Palin a pig? The woman just had a child in April, for God’s sake. I think she’s in fine shape, and even if she weren’t we just don’t go there. I just think the former Governor is jealous that she was overlooked in favor of Palin.
Positively Yours,
Shawn