A Nice Fit For National Condom Week
February 19, 2010
A recent, small study at the University of Kentucky examined why some don’t enjoy condoms- the main reason? They don’t fit right. That’s according to the 400 young men who’d recently used (or attempted to use) condoms for penile-vaginal intercourse.
Read the report on Poz.com here.
With this week being National Condom Week, this report is quite timely. Finding the right partner can take some time- we all know that. But we never really acknowledge that finding the right condom takes patience as well. I’m sure a lot of young and older folks alike who are just engaging in sexual activity are probably turned off by a not-so-satisfying first-time condom experience. Particularly if the condom slips off, or tears because it is ill-fitted and/ or lubrication wasn’t used. That’s like going out for drinks, only to find out on the drive home that your designated driver is thoroughly shitfaced.
So how do we prevent this scenario from happening?
Well, why not bring more than one condom to the dance when you are first giving it go? Make finding the right condom for you and your partner an event, like a Price Is Right game that takes place behind a closed-door that the studio audience isn’t even aware of. That’s way hotter than Plinko, even when someone leans way over the board before dropping the disc down. Whatever mental image makes the idea of finding the right condom exciting for you is the key, and anything’s better than letting someone lose faith in the condom, or not discuss their disappointment or be too embarrassed to explore why it didn’t feel just right.
Thankfully, I found my favorite condom companion a long-time ago. Gwenn and I have tried others along the way, but I always go back to what’s worked best for me. (Lifestyles Ultra Sensitive in the gray box.) And, ya know, something better may come along as it has throughout the vast history of protecting one’s little fellow. So trying a different condom- safely- is a good idea, too. Because missing out on a more pleasurable upgrade would be, well… just click the Play button below.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
ShawnandGwenn.com Shawn’s Poz columns Shawn’s Sick Days in 2010: 6 Shawn’s book Decker’s Daily Coffee
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The Reveal of Me as “LemonAIDS”
October 5, 2009
This past weekend in DC was incredible. I had the privilege to do a My Pet Virus reading at the Committee of Ten Thousand’s 20 Year Survivors on Friday evening, then got to walk with Team Supersnack in the AIDS Walk in DC, raising over $34,000 with our group.
And I got to do the latter looking like this!
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Shawn on:
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YouTube Video of Me and Gwenn
July 21, 2009
Here’s another new YouTube video, this one is of me and Gwenn speaking. Not just, like, speaking to each in the comfort of our own home, but out and about spreading awareness about HIV/AIDS and sexual health.
It’s what we do- check it out!
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Tomorrow is National HIV Testing Day
June 26, 2009
Tomorrow is National HIV Testing Day. Don’t be an “Unknown”- know your HIV status. TKNO (The Know Now Organization) comes to you and provides discreet HIV testing. Check them out, and follow them on Twitter @TKNO.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Share the Blog. Not the Virus. See my band play in Charlottesville on July 11!
Michael Jackson’s History with AIDS
June 26, 2009
I didn’t mean for the title of this blog to be misleading. Michael Jackson did not have AIDS. But I didn’t want to not blog about what everyone will be talking about today. Yes, today I am a follower.
I’ve always been a consumer of pop culture. This is, by far, the biggest loss of a pop star in my lifetime. The only reason why I’m not counting John Lennon is because I was only 5 when he was murdered. In terms of Jackson’s art, I wasn’t a fan of much of anything that wasn’t on Thriller, Jacko’s shining moment. In my eyes, however, one other moment shines much brighter than that album: his stand on compassion for those with AIDS.
In particular, his public support of Ryan White.
I know, *insert boy joke here*. But really, when he and Elton John came forward to pour resources into this fight, they understood how important it was to get the public’s attention and appeal to peoples’ greater sense of good. By choosing to align themselves with Ryan’s own mission to educate and enlighten people on the issues surrounding AIDS, they raised the visibility of the injustice Ryan- and others with HIV- were faced with.
Click to watch the video and hear the song he wrote in tribute to Ryan White. Yes, I admit, it’s cheesy. But hey, I’m trying to focus on my own greater sense of good, and am thankful that he stepped forward at a very scary time in this country’s history, and advocated for the well-being of positoids everywhere.
On a different note, I have to say that “Thriller” is the greatest music video of all-time. He wasn’t kidding when he told the girl in the video that he wasn’t like all the other guys, was he?
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Share the Blog. Not the Virus. (Thanks, Stacia, for the Get Well Coffeeeeeez!)
Teen Vogue Rejects “Condom” Ad
June 24, 2009
Moving along from fake scandals (previous blog entry) to real ones. Just in case you don’t know, Just In Case, Inc. is a company that provides cool little discreet condom carrying cases. “Intimacy Compacts for Women” is how they describe them.
Here’s what they look like.
Great idea, right?
Well, Teen Vogue magazine doesn’t think so. Or they may like them, but they decided to deny them ad space. Of course, the magazine is a business, and can do whatever it wants. But this action speaks to the frustration that is the battle for reality-based sex education/awareness in the United States.
I caught up with Rachael Sudul of Just In Case Inc. to get more pissed off about this.
Q: so Rachael- you have a great product that has encourages healthy decision-making… Tell me what went down with Teen Vogue?
Rachael: We received an email through a separate company trying to sell remnant ad space for Teen Vogue and we thought it was a perfect publication for our product, with the rate of STDs in teens and young adults being 1 in 4. We had hoped to also spark a conversation. When we went to take advantage of the ad rate, we were told that the editors at Teen Vogue didn’t want us to advertise with them.
That blows.
It is a disheartening, yet predictable decision. Interesting however since one of their articles in the June/July issue is: “Modern Romance From kissing to “sexting,” check out what teens consider “hooking up” today.” Sex is used to sell everything even in Teen Vogue; jeans, makeup, food… so we teach our kids and young adults how to seduce in every aspect yet wave our fingers and yell about being abstinent.
And those editors- like politicians who champion abstinence- conveniently ignore their own sexual histories when they were teens. What message do you hope your product sends to people?
What our product represents is people taking responsibility for their sexual health, young or old, if you are CHOOSING to be sexually active, and you are not 100% sure of your own status or your partner’s, use a condom.
When you’re not being cockblocked by Teen Vogue, whom do you advertise with?
We have advertised with Shape magazine and have had a good amount of editorials in large publications such as Shape, Self, Life&Style, and even Grey’s Anatomy magazine. Kate Walsh talked about our compacts on the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - it’s the last few minutes of this interview.
Too cool. So there is hope. Do you have a favorite dumb reaction to your product?
The reaction is always to the condom… “oh I don’t use condoms!!” As if they are reserved for the more promiscuous of us… if we could just normalize the condom by talking about it we could erase the stigma it has… birth control pills had a stigma as well in the beginning and it has diminished over the years. We can advertise Viagra and KY Lubricant during prime time on national TV, but not the condom? Interestingly the STD rates have skyrocketed in seniors with many thanks to that little blue pill since they believe pregnancy is the worst that unprotected sex can bring…
Yeah, sexual health isn’t just for the whippersnappers anymore. Thanks for your time, Rachael, and thanks to you and your mom for creating such a necessary- and cool- product. Viva la condom!
To learn more about the cases, and get one for yourself, go to justincaseinc.com. You can also follow Rachael on Twitter, which is where I first heard about this. Please share this interview with others.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Share the Blog. Not the Virus. See Shawn’s band play in Charlottesville on July 11!
More Porn Stars Are Positive
June 13, 2009
Yesterday it was announced that at least 16 porn stars have tested positive since 2004, which brings the total to 22 over the last five years.
Unlike me, in high school and college Gwenn went beyond Algebra I pt. 2. She assured me that with roughly 1,200 people in the porn industry each year, five positives a year would mean that you have a .0033 chance of contracting HIV if you enter porn as a career. Of course, prevention is everything, so how you conduct yourself offset and what scenes you star in have some bearing on risk factors.
But what about testing?
At a recent porn convention in L.A. , some in the industry thought the 30-day voluntary HIV tests were doing their job, while others suggested that more were needed. Adult film star Belladonna said, “I don’t think 30 days is good enough. This is our bodies, our life, our
work.” Belladonna also retweeted (on Twitter) that having another active STD makes you more vulnerable to HIV infection. Being informed is sexy, isn’t it?
Unlike the storylines in a porn movie, the plot in this one is thickening by the red, hot and blue minute.
And yes, I know I could have used the word “thickening” in a better context there.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Porn Star Tests Positive for HIV
June 12, 2009
A female pornstar has tested positive for HIV, which brings back memories from 2004 when a male performer tested positive and shut the entire industry down amidst safety concerns.
In actuality, the adult film industry as a hole- er, whole- has done very well with their testing programs for HIV.
The article on Poz, linked above, reports that there is concern over the high incidence of chlamydia and gonorrhea infections and how that plays into the push for mandatory condom use in all adult entertainment movies.
Well, unless the industry is really covering up HIV infections, you have to take your jimmyhat off to them. Think about it- how many acts of unprotected sex have been performed by routinely (every 30 days) tested “actors”? To have one infection in 5 years is something to be applauded, not criticized.
Health officials are cracking down. But if California is worried about sexually transmitted infections, then what’s holding them back from invading every college campus in the state? I’m sure that all of the campuses in California combined are reporting more than 60 to 80 new cases of chlamydia and gonorrhea infections a month.
To me, the best thing for adult film stars is to have comprehensive education about how to protect themselves off set, when they are engaging in sexual acts with people whose jobs do not require STI testing. And the best thing for college students?
Take a lesson in HIV testing from a pornstar.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Reagan Statue, Like Prez Himself, Is Silent on AIDS
June 11, 2009
Last week a 40-foot bronze statue of Ronald Reagan was unveiled in Washington DC. Here’s a speech given by Congressman John Boehner, who cries, yet again.
Boehner, like many Republicans, has a soft spot the size of the national debt for Reagan. But for people with AIDS, Reagan is not a symbol of a better time. He’s the chief enabler of an act of domestic terrorism. Harsh? Reality can be. Can you imagine 40,000 people dying today and the president saying nothing? (I’m including W. in this hypothetical, too.) Ten Americans get the sniffles today, and Obama would be on CNN with a box of tissues and a tear in his eye.
But then, when Reagan finally spoke, his words were dickish. You can hear them here.
“… let’s be honest with ourselves, AIDS information can not be what some call ‘value neutral.’ After all, when it comes to preventing AIDS, don’t medicine and morality teach the same lessons.” Ronald Reagan, April 2, 1987
Maybe I’m missing the point here. Perhaps that statue isn’t the worst idea, because it will provide school children with an excellent lesson on exactly how Reagan dealt with the crisis, which went on to kill millions upon millions more. “Kids, any questions for the president about AIDS?”
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Sean Strub on Activism
June 8, 2009
Through my boyish charm and way with the written word, I was able to catch up with Sean Strub online and get his thoughts on the early days of AIDS activism, as well as what went down in Hollywood last Friday at the protest…
Hey Sean, how did the protest in CA go?
Sheryl Lee Ralph was amazing, passionate, well-informed and rallied the crowd. She spoke several times. There was no civil disobedience. The crowd was lively and worked up, but not especially large.
Sounds good. Do activist groups like ACT UP have more potential for change with Obama in the White House as opposed to Bush?
I think it depends on the specific issue at hand. Certainly the potential for change with Obama is vastly greater than with Bush, but the process to affect that change is much different. With Bush, we were totally iced out; with Obama we have people like Jeff Crowley, the former deputy director of NAPWA, as his federal AIDS Policy Coordinator. He’s just one example, but across the administration the level of expertise and experience with the epidemic is vastly greater and comes from a different perspective.
It’s seems like you’d have to be nicer with an administration that might actually help you, but then again, it’s easier to get angry at someone whom you expect more from...
I wish they would have already lifted the ban on needle exchange and other things, but the single most important thing the Obama administration can do for people with HIV is to get universal health coverage. If everything else, in terms of the epidemic, needs to be put on hold in favor of that priority, for strategic reasons, then I am willing to be patient.
While you are being patient, care to reflect on a favorite personal ACT UP moment from the past?
In terms of specific moments the two that first come to mind are when Peter Staley, and I were on top of the roof of Sen. Jesse Helms’ house, unfurling the giant condom.
I love that one. It’s a Will Ferrell movie waiting to happen.
There’s also the moment during the Stop the Church! demonstration at St. Patrick’s cathedral when I took communion. The group I was part of (were we called the “Hail Marys”?) all took communion and when the priest held up the consecrated host and said “The Body of Christ” we would say something like “Safe Sex is Moral Sex!” or “I support a woman’s right to choose!” or whatever. I said “May the Lord bless the man I love who died a year ago today” as it was the anniversary of Michael Misove’s death.
That’s hardcore, Sean. And I love that phrase, by the way, “Safe Sex is Moral Sex”. Thanks for sharing the activist insight, and if there’s ever another home that needs to be fitted with a giant condom, count me in.
You bet.
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