Religion & HIV Prevention
October 12, 2010
I’m not a religious guy, but I do believe in something bigger than our physical bodies- I just don’t know what exactly “it” is. Do I believe that humans are more important than toads? Yes. But that’s because I am human and I am blessed/cursed with self-awareness and ego. That said, I do love me some toads.
As long as they don’t startle me.
What does startle me is the lack of an HIV prevention message in churches.
Often times I wonder: if I weren’t HIV positive would I be more religious? Officially, my status doesn’t exclude me from any particular religion, but when I tested positive in 1987 at age 11 my parents did encounter a few roadblocks when they tried to join a couple of churches in our small hometown. That was fine by me; I loved sleeping in on Sundays. As I came to terms with my status, I was welcomed into the AIDS community by a very friendly, outstretched arm of support from the gay community. After that, I took it personally whenever I’d see homophobic speech from fellow Virginia boys such as Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson.
There are lots of churches that help people with AIDS and welcome them into their flock. The problem I have is the lack of HIV prevention, particularly in the African American community, where AIDS is the leading cause of death among African American women in their early 40′s. One would think that HIV prevention for teens would kick off Sunday school every weekend, but I think one of the problems with churches in general is a focus on things that people wrote one hundred years, when the focus should be on today’s issues and what we can do as people to help one another through the challenges of modern day living.
Perhaps I’m viewing the whole issues from the AIDS-colored lenses? As someone who has lived with this energy-sapping, socially stigmatized medical condition, I do what I can to prevent the spread of HIV by educating about how the virus is transmitted. At the same time, I’m sensitive to those who, like myself, are already infected.
For Catholics, the big hang up is condom use. I’ve spoken at a few catholic universities with my wife partner, Gwenn, and we shared how we used condoms to keep her HIV negative. Among the younger generation, there is an openness about this topic that is coming to light, and it’s a wonderful thing to see.
My frustration with the lack of religious backing in HIV prevention is that they have the one thing that HIV educators seek out more than anything: a captive audience. If you have someone’s ear, then you have their heart; you have their trust. And if you are providing life-saving information, then what better example can you give of truly valuing human life? Valuing human life after it’s been conceived, when we all start to get a little more complicated than our humble, sperm and egg beginnings. I wish the churches would do more, and then I think about the judgmental tone that it is often used in religion… in HIV prevention work, taking that tact could actually do more harm than good in terms of risk reduction.
Sadly, until religions can adequately confront their homophobia, they will remain of no use in the battle against HIV. In that regard, I sometimes wonder if toads would have a better chance of licking this problem than us humans.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
PS… be sure to read the September 2010 Poz cover story by Trenton Straube, on why the ex-gay movement is a danger to gay and questioning youth and how homophobia increases the risk of HIV transmission.Hope everyone had a great National Coming Out day yesterday!
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Happy 70th Birthday, John Lennon
October 9, 2010
Thirty years ago at age 40 the world’s most celebrated musician, John Lennon, was murdered. A social activist with a healthy sense of right and wrong was lost just before the AIDS crisis hit. It’s safe to assume that, had fate allowed him at least one more decade, he would have been a major ally in this fight.
Imagine… songs about AIDS that don’t suck. John calling out President Reagan for his silence on the topic. Advocating for clean needle exchange programs and safe sex. I think, or I hope, that he would have been at the forefront of every struggle we as people with HIV have faced along the way… because I seriously doubt that- with how hard HIV hit the art community- he wouldn’t have seen the effects of this in his social circle.
So, in thinking about this today, I want to wish you a Happy Birthday, John, wherever you are, just in case you are on your laptop poking around the Poz Blogs. And, if you are in Heaven and there is a God, I’m confidant that he knew full well what you meant when you wrote that line in “Imagine”.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Bill Clayton and Bullying of GLBT Youth
October 6, 2010
While the recent rash of suicides among GLBT youth has been devastating, it’s heartening that it’s being discussed openly that gay youth are at a higher risk to take their own lives. One of the reasons is that bullying for them in public places- such as school- is tolerated by fellow students and faculty.
When I first went online to dip my toes in disclosure regarding my HIV status, I met a lot of people who were using the internet as a means to help themselves as well as others. I met Steve Schalchlin- my surrogate Godparent, positoid pal and fellow movie-review cohort. Steve had gone online for the opposite reason I did; I was excited to start a new chapter in my own personal history with HIV, while he was sick and planned to document his decline in health for family members because emails and phone calls seemed too exhausting. Steve introduced me to Gabi Clayton, a mother and activist on GLBT issues from Washington state.
In 1995, she lost one of her sons, Bill Clayton, to suicide. A month prior, he had been targeted and beaten. The event left him wondering what place he had in this world, undoubtedly. Instead of grieving in private, his parents opted to educate the public on what their son went through, and how to prevent something like that from happening to other parents. They became heavily involved in PFLAG and Gabi even appeared on Riki Lake to discuss the issue. (Steve wrote a song about her, too.)
As I grew closer to Steve and Gabi, I felt saddened that I didn’t get a chance to meet Bill, who was pretty close to my age. He died at 17, I was 20 when I decided that living in silence with regard to my HIV status wasn’t acceptable anymore. Three years isn’t a big gap, but when I thought about it, at 17 I could have never imagined disclosing my HIV status online. At 17, three years is a lifetime away…
There are a lot more resources now than there were in 1995. Dan Savage has started a brilliant campaign that encourages supporters, as well as adults in the GLBT community, to share their insights online, hoping teens who are doubting their purpose in life might get a glimpse into a future that holds more than insults and humiliation. The campaign is called “It Gets Better”.
Here’s Dan and his partner Terry’s video:
There’s also a documentary about a landmark case regarding bullying in public schools. It’s called Bullied, and here’s the trailer…
Here’s to hoping that these multiple waves of support, online resources, understanding of the impact of intolerance and the glimpse of a brighter future ahead saves some lives in the coming days, weeks and years.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Website: ShawnandGwenn.com
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AIDS is a Drag (AIDS Walk 2010 Pics)
October 4, 2010
Team Supersnack showed up in full force this year, but the belles of the ball were definitely the AIDS is a Drag crew. It looks like I’m pageant posing here, but I’m actually holding my Wal-Mart hat between my legs, I couldn’t bear to wear it alongside this impressive squad of AIDS Walkers.
Speaking of the hat… I’d foolishly stated on Facebook- which is quickly outpacing AIDS as the worst thing I have to live with- that if a joke photo of me in the douchetron hat got like 80 comments or Likes then I’d buy it and wear it through Christmas. Some terrible, terrible people launched a campaign and now I have the hat. Poz blogger David Copogna posted on my page, “I’m sorry, you look like a redneck with that Jesus baseball cap on. Was that the point?”
I limped my way across the finish line on Saturday, in what is now a tradition of injuring myself during AIDS Walks. It’s my bum ankle, it really starts to tweak out around the two mile point, and really craps out after we do a post-Walk team brunch. There’s talk of renting me a Segway for next year’s Walk, which is the only thing more humiliating than wearing my bedazzled hat.
But hey, I’d make it work. Segways look fun, and I’d dress up as a cop and grow out the worst mustache I possibly could. Perhaps carry a megaphone and cheer all the other Walkers on, which would get old after about 300 feet or so. One way or another, I’ll be there every year to Walk. I love it- seeing so many people who care about the issue and want to kick AIDS in the balls is an incredible thing.
Thanks again to all my donors this year, including my mom who told Gwenn and I to “put food on the card”- which was mostly used for drinks. Oh, and a big thanks to Kimpton Hotels for putting us and Team Supersnack, who were once again the largest non-corporate fundraiser in the AIDS Walk, up. It’s nice to have the support of a GLBT-friendly chain of hotels that gets the fact that we need to continue to fight HIV, one swift kick to the nads at a time.
For now, I put my feet up. Where’s my Cryo Cuff?
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Facebook and Twitter
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com
Also check out
the lovely Gwenn’s
Fashion/Coffee Blog
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THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.
LIFE IN PHOTOS
Face Time fun with my Goddaughter. She was digging our phone chat- even though we were about three feet away from one another.
Making the enemy quit out with @squirrel_munky and @vaineos :)
Closing out the Joe with @gwennbarringer this afternoon.
Caught in full Mocha Mode...
Speaking About Sexual Health
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