Book #2 Finished… Now What?
May 29, 2009
It’s been a little over a year and a half of the most nonstop writing of my life. But Book #2, the vampire book, is finally finished as of 2 AM Wednesday morning. To mark the occasion, this was my Decker’s Daily photo the next afternoon.
That’s straw paper in my mouth. It wasn’t until after the photo was snapped that I figured out that vampires holding iced mochas are not scary, no matter how rock solid their body is with well-defined muscle.
I forced myself to stop blogging about writing the book, but now that I’m done I’m lifting the ban. I’ve been irregular in blogging the last two weeks because I was really cracking down on finishing the book- a humorous tale of vampirism, set in a small town, centered around a group of incoming freshmen.
Yes, HIV is involved. It’s my specialty!
The book was a joy to write. I discovered my addiction to iced mochas through this ordeal. But, at this moment, I am relieved that it is out of my hands. Right now, my lit agent is going to look over it and then we’ll submit it to the publisher. When I get any word on it, I’ll definitely blog it.
So… with colleges out of session and no more high school talks… how does a positoid fill his day? Of course, I’ll keep drinking iced mochas, and Gwenn will keep snapping Decker’s Daily photos, which are being called “Iconic Imagery!”, “Daring Pictures!” and “Bravery in the Face of Mochas!” by no one. What’s cool about the joke of Decker’s Daily is that I got some sponsors (Thank you again!), and one of them actually led to one of the discussions I had last week with an incredible Gay/Straight Alliance formed at a nearby high school. It’s very cool the random ways in which we meet people, isn’t it?
With book #2 complete, finding a creative outlet didn’t take long. Tonight I had band practice with Synthetic Division. “Wait,” you say. “Can you really call a synth duo getting together with an iPod band practice?” Yes, you can! But you don’t think so, how about a synth trio? With a drummer?
A human drummer!
That’s Marshall on keyboards. He joined me when my bandmate left in 2007, within a month of the end of his previous band, In Tenebris. That’s Mike Johnson on drums, he was in In Tenebris with Marshall, so they immediately locked it down without any problems.
Now, if Christina- the former singer of In Tenebris- shows up at practice next time, I’ll know that I’ve been kicked out of Synthetic Division. The victim of a non-violent (hopefully) takeover from the inside. But really, adding drums and a friend to the band is going to make things a lot more fun.
I’ll be posting more about our first Charlottesville show in July next week and, as I wait for a word on the book, I’ll be turning to music for artistic solace.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Memorial Day Musings
May 25, 2009
The recent issue of Poz features my former AIDS Walk NY rival, Kenneth Cole, on the cover. Ah, last year, it was so much fun fake feuding with him, and this year it was kind of odd not walking the Walk after spending the last few doing so with Team Supersnack.
Don’t worry- I’m not giving up on AIDS. It’s never given up on me, unfortunately. Anyway, Team Supersnack is gearing up for the AIDS Walk Washington in October. Maybe I’ll invite a conservative politician to walk with us, then when they don’t respond I’ll claim they hate me for having AIDS? I’m sure I’ll come up with something to make my fundraising blogs fun to read…
I’m always open to suggestions.
The last two weeks I’ve been spending my time writing and speaking to area high school students. The last talk is this week, and it’s been great getting the word out. I really wish Gwenn and I could speak at high schools the way we do with colleges, outside of the area. It’s an issue of funding, schools that are struggling to keep their Music class doors open can’t really fly in two people to talk about sex for an hour.
Still, I’m sure there’s a way. Bill Gates, if you’ve been quietly following this blog for years drop me an email.
In some ways, I feel like I have a time clock that’s ticking- perhaps it’s a youth/relatability concern combined with my own thoughts about how many more years the idea of traveling will appeal to me. Thankfully, none of the concerns have anything to do with my health or commitment to speaking out, and I feel like my best years of educating are ahead of me.
I’m in an interesting position as an educator. I have a history with HIV that holds a lot of educational value- from discrimination (kicked out of elementary school, original godparents bailed) to dating issues and sex. Being a straight dude with a hot, smart HIV educator partner affords a great opportunity to open eyes to safer sex. Basically, I want to do everything I can to get the word out about prevention and compassion for people living with HIV/AIDS.
OK, that was deep. Back to watching Keyboard Cat videos with me. And thank you to all the men and women who have served in the military, and the families that love, miss and support them.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Hemo2Homo Connection: Star Trek
May 18, 2009
The Hemo2Homo Connection is Shawn Decker and Steve Schalchlin. Just two guys with AIDS who like to review movies.
The creators/stars of the Hemo2Homo Connection met online in 1996, and posted their first movie review in 1998. Both have been living with HIV for over twenty years, and have annoyed their friends and loved ones for much longer than that.
Steve Schalchlin (”Homo”) resides in Los Angeles, CA. He is an award-winning musician, singer and songwriter. Shawn Decker (”Hemo”) lives in Charlottesville, VA. He is an HIV/AIDS educator and the author of My Pet Virus.
The STAR TREK Review
HEMO: Seen any good movies recently, Hemo?
HEMO2031: Why yes, I have. Star Trek. Did you see it as well, Hemo?
HEMO: I did. And, overall, I enjoyed this film. Star Trek is the best Space AIDS movie since Starship Troopers.
HOMO: Shawn, who the hell are you talking to?
HEMO: I’ll tell you- in the future. For now, just know that I’m tired of being the young, wide-eyed half of this movie duo. You and I have been working together for 10 years now, and you always get to play the part of “Wise Sage Steve”, or “Mr. Movies” as they call you on the streets of Hollywood…
HOMO: No one has ever called me that.
HEMO: Not my point. My point is- I’ve survived over twenty years with HIV. But no matter how much older I get, you age at the same rate!
HOMO: Did you learn that heady stuff from Star Trek? What the hell is HEMO2031?
HEMO: It’s me, 22 years from now. That makes HEMO2031 your current age- 55. He/me is your equal. And I brought him back from the year 2031 to review Star Trek with me.
HOMO: This will be fun to watch.
HEMO2031: Nice to meet you, Steve.
HEMO: I call him “Homo”.
HEMO2031: In the year 2031 calling a gay man “Homo” is a crime that is punishable by death. If you don’t mind, I’ll call Steve “Steve”.
HOMO: He doesn’t mean anything by it, Hemo2031. I call him “Hemo.” Is that okay?
HEMO2031: Sure- but no one will know what you’re talking about in the year 2031, because hemophilia will be cured by then.
HOMO: Ha! Hear that, Hemo? Your kind will be extinct, and my kind will rule the Earth!
HEMO: This isn’t going how I planned. Look, this is all fascinating stuff about the future, really, but can we get back to Star Trek?
HOMO: Did you see the coming attractions? Previews are starting to feel longer than twenty-two years. This time, there was a long live-action version of that puppet film, Team America, complete with a fake Eiffel Tower being destroyed by some guys dressed like Iron Man who fight some multi-colored robots from outer space who are also attacking the Vatican.
It was called G.I. Transforminator.
HEMO: The G.I. Joe guys in those suits look like the NFL robots.
HOMO: Hey, Hemo2031, if you’re from the future, then you’ve already seen this flick. Any good?
HEMO2031: It will be deemed a classic of all time and they’ll pass a law that all movies must be sequels to G.I. Transforminator.
HOMO: With nothing but robots as characters? That will be the end of the AIDS movie as we know them. Will there be a Hemo2Homo Connection in 2031? My God- I’ll be 77. Will I be… alive?
HEMO2031: Yes, and yes. But the Hemo2Homo Connection will only review Michael Bay directed G.I. Transforminator movies from the year 2012 on, when President Jeb Bush signs into Michael Bay Act into law.
HOMO: That sounds like a fate far worse than death to me.
HEMO: … so no more movies about AIDS? We should really cherish Star Trek.
HOMO: You really see this as an AIDS movie? I thought you’d see it as a horror movie! It started right at the beginning with Kirk sitting at a table with Kleenex stuffed up his bloody nose. Then came Kid Spock kicking some other Vulcan kid’s ass… just like they used to beat you up in school just to watch you bleed! Fortunately, Spock’s blood is green and not all AIDS-y like yours.
HEMO: I was too distracted by the green-skinned bimbo to notice the green blood. It wasn’t until Spock’s planet was destroyed that it all clicked for me. “There’s only 10,000 Vulcans remaining,” Spock said. An obvious reference to the 1980’s blood scandal and The Committee of Ten Thousand.
HOMO: So this isn’t just an AIDS movie? It’s a thinblooded AIDS movie? Geesh. Hey, I wonder if they have Vulcan blood clogger-upper or if AIDS can be transmitted into copper-based blood? HEMO2031, any answers?
HEMO: I have a confession to make: I made up the HEMO2031 thing.
HOMO2031: Past me forgives you.
HEMO2031: Past me accepts.
HEMO: I can’t imagine how cranky you’ll be about movies at age 77, Homo. So what did you like most about Star Trek?
HOMO: I loved how the other characters on the bridge who channeled the spirit of the originals–and not just like extras. Each of them showing motivation, strength, innocence and fortitude. Not as much as us, and our ability to survive with AIDS. But close.
HEMO: The cast is great. My only beef with Star Trek was the CGI snow creatures scene, and the hanging on by the fingernails scenes. I hate those kinds of things in any movie, especially in one where you care about the characters. I’d rather have seen young Spock having a private conversation with his lady than watch Kirk narrowly cheat death. Again.
HOMO: Yeah, note to directors out there: The word “cliffhanger” is a metaphor. Still, you gotta give it up for a Hollywood movie with actual characters. They must have hired a gay. It’s the only explanation.
HEMO: It’s the only explanation for not seeing Green Alien Bimbo’s ta-tas.
HOMO: Kirk did look good in his undies in that scene. Maybe his not-so-light saber and her green boobs will be in the extras on the DVD? But Star Trek was just like the Hemo2Homo Connection… it was funny! This movie made me laugh out loud again and again. It felt like the real Star Trek, not like that tired Wolverine farce.
As for the rest of the summer, I’m already tired of G.I. Transforminator.
HEMO2031: Just wait until the year 2017, when you’re reviewing G.I. Transforminator 29: Rise Again of the Machines Again.
HOMO: Please, AIDS, take me now?
Share the Blog. Not the Virus. Gwenn… Back…. Book!
May 15, 2009
So the last image of Gwenn on the blog was a bit disconcerting. Here she is yesterday, when we both ventured out for coffee (she had tea) with one of our buddies, Evelyn. Who apparently saw God.
Am off to speak to another English class today, then taking in some Decker’s Daily Coffee and book writing. I turn in the second book- which I swore to never blog about again- on Monday. It’s a vampire tale, and it has sucked the life from me! No, it’s actually been a joy to write. A long joy, but worth it because I am very happy with the results of all of the hard work.
Okay, no more about it until I get some sort of official word. Just cross your fingers that it is 1) good and 2) well-received and considered publish-worthy.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
High School English
May 14, 2009
Just had the privilege of speaking to a class of high school English students. It was more about being published and writing than having HIV, though I did go into a lot of the biographical background. (Hey, I did write a memoir.)
I shared a funny story about the time when I was assigned to do a book report in junior high school. The thought of reading an entire book was overwhelming, so my back-up plan was to find a random book, look at the chapter titles, and then write what I thought happened based on those titles. So, I wrote out my fake story… and it was fun. I actually felt invested in the characters, and got a good grade. I vaguely remember my 8th grade English teacher telling me how interesting the book sounded- which likely sent me to the library to hide the actual book, which bore no resemblance to my story.
At the end of the class, I offered the chance of a free book to the students, none of whom are on MySpace anymore. I knew the site was dead a while back, then the proof started coming in emails. “Hey- see what your friends are doing on MySpace!” It’s the same thing Friendster started to do when they began to spiral in their throes of death.
Anyway, I also offered a Synthetic Division CD giveaway. Well, the teacher said, “Let them hear it!” Thankfully, a couple of students were Tori Amos fans, so I had a couple of people on my side before the first note of our “Raspberry Swirl” cover hit…
It was kind of cool- sharing all the personal information about testing positive, dating, being diagnosed with AIDS right after falling in love… and I’m mortified when my music starts playing. That’s what I’m most afraid of being rejected for! After 30 seconds of two songs, I realized I needed my keyboard player, Marshall (who graciously made a grocery run for Gwenn and I at 2 am on Tuesday night) and the neon sign to feel comfortable.
All in all, a fun day. I’m a lucky dude, and I’m glad that through speaking I can not only educate others, but constantly be reminded of all of the incredible things I have in my little positoid life.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
PS… I am all better from the bug. Gwenn is still tired, but getting better. Dave Gahan of Depeche Mode is still ailing, the band has had to cancel numerous shows… tell me: how do I handle the viral infection the best of the three of us?
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Nap For The Cure
May 13, 2009
Yesterday, Gwenn woke me up- she’d been awake for hours, sick. We took her to Outpatient Care to get answers fast without waiting around. Since it’s not her blog, I’ll just say she was having stomach issues.
In the couple of hours that we were there, I started to feel funny. I thought I was just nervous for Gwenn, seeing her hooked up to an IV for fluids, and knowing how much she hates needles. I’m much better at being the ill one, that’s for sure. On the way home, we stopped at Rite Aid (they keep condoms out in the open!) and got the prescriptions filled for anti-nausea medication.
On the way home, we hit every red light.
Gwenn was exhausted and just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep. I tried every shortcut, but none of my attempts to get us home while driving the speed limit helped. Finally, we made it. I could barely get my shoes off in time- I ran to the bathroom and threw up. Then threw down. This was more than empathy sickness. After five hours of napping in between bathroom visits, I was okay. Gwenn, she just slept and slept and slept.
“Are you alive?” I texted to no response.
We watched TV together for a few hours around midnight, then went back to bed. That was our Tuesday. (Apparently Dave Gahan of Depeche Mode had a similar experience that day.)
Today, we laid around some more.
Our AIDS Walk team, Supersnack, is hosting a fundraiser in Brooklyn to kick off fundraising efforts for the October 3 AIDS Walk Washington. We won’t be able to attend (not because of the sick days), but what’s cool is that you don’t have to be in Brooklyn to support the team, either.
Ingeniously, our team captain is also kicking off Saturday with the first annual “Supersnack: Nap for the Cure”.
The way it works is, Gwenn and I pledge to take a nap this Saturday May 16th, and you pledge to sponsor our nap for $25. We feel good about fighting AIDS while sleeping, you feel good about encouraging our slothful side…
And, of course, we raise money to help positoids in the DC area. I think I’m going to bed now, to make sure I’m in proper napping shape for Saturday.
The last two days have guaranteed that we are serious about our napping. Fortunately we are both on the mend, and so neither of our naps will be in a hospital environment.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Hemo2Homo Connection: Wolverine
May 11, 2009
The X-Men Origins: WOLVERINE Review
Hemo: Hey Homo, everyone’s all like, “Have you seen Star Trek? Have you? Huh?” It’s a recession, and I’m still counting my dollars trying to figure out if I’m going to see the Wolverine movie…
Homo: I’ve never been so disappointed in a movie in my life.
Hemo: See? Good thing I didn’t rush out to see Star Trek…
Homo: No, I’m talking about Wolverine. You know, positoid, that I am a lifelong X-Men fan. Growing up, they were the superhero gays that I couldn’t be. I even put this into a song in The Big Voice. The first two X-Men movies were so good, especially the second one, because the filmmaker knew what most comic readers know: It ain’t about the action. It’s about the characters.
Hemo: Yes! That’s why Watchmen was so good.
Homo: Exactly. Your mutant abilities are finally forming, Hemo. But in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, they manage to take all the mystery out of Wolverine, reducing him to a whiny little bitch, running around afraid of his big, bad older brother…
Hemo: Maybe in part two of Origins they reveal that Wolverine was born a Thinblood? It’s scary being a little brother with a bleeding disorder, knowing that at any time your big bro can erase you from existence.
Homo: That’s how it is for all little brothers. In this, he’s trying so hard to be a nice guy: THAT IS NOT WOLVERINE. That’s a whiny little bitch who hates being all mean and stuff. Where’s the fun? Where are the wisecracks? WHERE IS WOLVERINE??
So, having drained all the blood out of Wolverine, we’re treated to a movie that looks like it was made from stock footage from other “action movies” with Hugh Jackman’s face painted on the “hero.”
Tacky, dull, stodgy.
Not only that, but it’s the kind of movie where you are saying the cliched lines of dialogue along with the actors on the screen because there’s not a single original thought being expressed. And, but, for an origin story, we don’t really learn anything about what drives him. There’s a generic falling in love story. Bad guys kill the girl / must get revenge plot. But you don’t really know the girl and you don’t really fall in love with their relationship.
Have I mentioned how angry this makes me?
Hemo: Not to my knowledge.
Homo: Wolverine is a great character. It’s not right for him to be the SECOND BADDEST GUY in the story. And who’s the bigger, badder guy? My most unfavorite character in the Marvel Universe whose “power” is that his fingernails grow really long. I saw that on RuPaul’s Drag Race. I don’t need it in a super not-quite-villain whose motivations are also fuzzier than a homeless man’s belly button.
Shall I tell you how much I loathed this movie, Hemo?
Hemo: Be like the old Wolverine, don’t pull any punches!
Homo: I walked out during the end credits. Not because of low t-cells or anything- I just didn’t care about the extra scene.
Hemo: Sounds like this film should be sent off on the Starship Enterprise, to be reviewed in a future not so far away by the Mystery Science Theatre 3000 guys. Thanks for saving me some money, sorry your heroes let you down.
—————————————
Wanna know a hero who never let Steve of the Hemo2Homo Connection down? Dom DeLuise. This review is dedicated to the actor’s memory, who passed this month at the age of 75.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
“Jim and I are heartbroken. Dom was one of the nicest persons to me.
When we met, I think I was very ill at the time. We were invited to a
family picnic. I was just treated like one of the family. As he became
increasingly immobile, we would see Carol, but never Dom. He was a genuinely hilarious comedian.”
- Steve Schalchlin
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Poz Magazine’s 15 year Anniversary
May 8, 2009
Poz Magazine’s 15th Anniversary issue is out- read it now!
I learn something new everytime I read this magazine, and that’s been the case since my doctor sent me my first issue back in 1996, when I learned that the vast, diverse experiences of people living with HIV were being shared. Not as a soundbite about suffering, but complex- real - lives.
Reading Poz cemented my decision at age 20 to refuse to live a secret life with HIV. Thanks for Poz, for showing positoids like me that, yes, a brighter future is in my hands.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Share the Blog. Not the Virus. …Thank you, Amir, for today’s coffee sponsorship- mochas gracias! -S
Blog of the Week
May 6, 2009
Yesterday I was crowned Charlottesville’s “Blog of the Week”. Most shockingly of all, I didn’t bestow this honor upon myself. Marijean Jaggers of WCAV did. It was on the local news last night, check it out!
(There’s a brief 10 second commercial that plays before… click here to read an interview about the blog.)
“This is the best of what blogging does-”
Thank you, Marijean!
What’s funny about the timing is that the station usually shoots some b-roll of the Blogger of the Week to go with the segment, but yesterday was Cinco de Mayo and the Mexican-American working class hero, Bruce Springsteen- AKA “El Bosso”- was in town to celebrate with a big concert.
You can buy his poorly-rendered wax likeness from the Hollywood Wax Museum for $2000-3000.
Well, Mr. Big Bosso, I rest easy knowing that nobody can own me. (Unless they buy a copy of my memoir My Pet Virus or a Synthetic Division song on iTunes, or treat me to a cup of coffee.) You’ve already packed your bags and left down, but I’m just now easing into a weeklong tenure as C’ville’s “Top Blog”.
And, unlike previous honorees, I plan to defend!
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Marijean is a great writer and blogger in her own right. Read a blog from 2007 about talking to her kid for the first time about the history of AIDS while listening to Queen. (Follow Marijean on Twitter: @Marijean Thanks to @hugel for the lead on that horrible Springsteen wax statue.)
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Lift the Ban on Blood
May 5, 2009
In 1985 the matching wrist/headband combo was quietly banned in clubs around the United States. That same year, the government banned gay people from donating blood because of fears surrounding HIV infection. I’m all for keeping blood supplies safe and bountiful- that’s why I support lifting this ban.
Why?
Because it’s dated.
Screening and collecting procedures have improved vastly since 1985. Plus, it is my understanding that one has to fill out a questionnaire to donate blood. Sexual activity should be assessed not on a sexual orientation level, but on a risk assessment level. Most people lie about their sexual history, anyway: so why would someone who wants to donate blood act differently?
And unless it’s Heidi Montag and her Swine Flu Patient Zero, Spencer Pratt, punishing someone based solely on who they are attracted to sexually is wrong.
I won’t be able to donate blood in my lifetime, but as someone with hemophilia I will rely on blood products for the rest of my life. If I am cured of HIV and hemophilia some day- cool- I’ll donate blood. Not being able to do so today, however, makes perfect sense.
If you agree with me about this ban, I say we show our objection in a way that cannot be ignored: with matching head and wristbands.
Positively Yours,
Shawn
Supporters of CA State Assembly member Tom Ammiano (D–San Francisco) resolution -AJR 13- to lift the ban include the American Red Cross,
America’s Blood Centers and the American Association for Blood Banks.
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